Speak Local

People who live in Western South Dakota usually can identify somebody from "Back East" right off the bat.

“Back East” is any place not west of the Missouri River … and that, more or less, includes the State Capitol, Pierre. BTW, you don't say Pierre like you're talking to a Frenchman. A local cowboy will most likely tell you we don't "pee air" out here.

The State Capitol is pronounced like pier, as in Pier. Some might think it strange that Pierre should be pronounced pier, but the folks in Cairo, Illinois, or Kearney, Nebraska, will understand.

The other thing you may notice is the high number of vehicles on the road that appear to be pickup trucks. But in Western South Dakota there are no pickup trucks. What you see are "rigs". Better yet, if you are serious about your rig, you call it a "dually". Ranchers, anybody who looks after at least 16,000 acres for the bank, will proudly display some hard-earned mud on their dually. If you see a rig that's new and shiny, it probably just pulled an RV up from Arizona and is owned by a “snowbird” – someone who summers in the Hills and winters Down South. Keep in mind that south is a direction not a place. The direction is "Down South".

Meanwhile, North Dakota does not exist. It might be shown on a few maps, but the place they are really trying to show is “The Patch” … as in oil patch. Also, New York, Massachusetts and California aren't believed to exist either … but, if they do, they must be part of Canada. Texas is a “whole 'nother matter kuz folks there are all hat and no cattle who don't know enough to keep the bulls**t on the outside of their boots.”

Speaking of non-existent, Rapid City does not exist.  There's just a place called "Rapid".

Women are "gals" and anybody older than 45 is "older than dirt".

A faker is "all hat and no cattle".

A "New Jersey Cowboy" is a poor horseback rider.

If somebody ain't hurt much you gotta say, "Are you gonna cowboy up or lie there and bleed?" And, if you've been thrown from a horse you might need to have a little "tea". ... whisky or other strong drink. In a bar fight, a pool cue is an "equalizer".

Only "real men" can drink "cowboy coffee".

"Silence is always the right answer." An inept person "needs to sit in the truck."  A shower is "dusting off".  A dumb person "needs to let his horse do the thinkin'."

Well, there's your starter course. Tell 'em you heard it from a guy who's older than dirt so it must be true.

Go back to normal speaking.